Category: News from the Dark Side
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HADEN’S FOLLY, AND MAIDENS OF MOLLIE
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King of the Clowns, Queens of the Town — This past Saturday, Southern Cal Clown College Athletic Director Pat Haden made a fool of himself, responding to a rule-violating text from the trojans’ Head Coach by bolting from the Press Box down to the field where he confronted game Officials…
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CLOWN COLLEGE COACH DEVELOPING “STERLING” REPUTATION
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U$C Head Coach Steve Sarkissian gets called out by one of his Black players for being a Racist and treating him like a slave Excuse me… Coach Sarkissian — Is it okay if I bring a Black person to one of your games? Okay, so let me get this straight…
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TROJAN IS FROWNING AFTER CROWNING, CUZ HE WAS CLOWNING ABOUT DROWNING
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Joshing about sloshing — Recently annointed “hero” and trojan Football player Josh Shaw is exposed for lying about diving off a balcony to save a 7-year old from drowning, prompting ESPN to declare u$c a “clown college” Well, well, well… I believe it is time for all you soft-hearted trojan…
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THE PETER PATTERN OF LITTLE CHEATS
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Still Cheaty After All These Years — Pete Carroll adds another sanction to his growing family of violations, as he and his Seahawks are fined over $300,000 for being REPEAT OFFENDERS in the utilization of contact in offseason practice As if anyone still needs for evidence to convince them of…
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JUST GIVE ME THE DAMN BALL-PEEN HAMMER!
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Wifebeater U — Yet another ex-trojan gets busted for violence against women, as Keyshawn Johnson gets arrested for domestic battery Somewhere in a Nevada jail cell, O.J. Simpson is thinking: “You should have finished the job!” After all, it’s harder to get convicted if the complaining witness is too dead…
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HUSKIES RAISE BRUIN SPIRITS, NON-HUSKIES RAISE EVERYTHING ELSE
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The UConn Huskies beat Kentucky to keep UCLA 3 ahead of the Wildcats in the battle for most NCAA Basketball Championships ever (11-8), 2 days after the not-husky-at-all USC Song Girls raise a million dollars for physically-challenged student-athletes, thereby raising the Spirits of everyone with a heart UConn beat the…
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DEEP-POCKET POOL PARTY
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The Color of Money, right on Cue — At the 2014 “Swim With Mike” Charity Event, Trojans and friends (and frenemies) Rack Up over one million dollars to fund scholarships for physically challenged athletes, as the 34-year total Breaks FIFTEEN million Minnesota has Minnesota Fats. Southern Cal has California Sveltes. …
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HAVE A NICE TRIP, (U-S-)C YOU NEXT FALL
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One ex-trojan admits receiving free luxury trips, including to Fiji, while playing for $C, a Pro player falls, thanks to a punch in the throat from another ex-trojan, and the current $C Basketball team ends their year in the first round of the Pac-12 Tourney, finishing a dreadful last-place campaign…
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FRED D. GOT FINGERED
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Ex-trojan Tight End Fred Davis gets suspended indefinitely by the NFL — for the SECOND TIME — for violating the League’s Substance Abuse Policy, AGAIN Do trojans ever learn? Even after getting busted, they show no remorse, they complain about the rules/laws, and they refuse to admit fault. Once again,…
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RETURN TO THE NORM
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Cheers — Norman Powell scores a season-high 21 (17 in the 2nd half) and spurs a 14-0 2nd half spurt to help UCLA overcome a 10-point deficit and BeatSC 83-73, completing a season sweep over the lowly trojans In a deviation from the norm, UCLA struggled in the 1st half…
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2014 is The Year of the Horse, but NOT the TROJAN Horse
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The Bruins absolutely destroy u$c and their snarky new Coach 107-73 in Basketball, then ESPN reports that Star QB Brett Hundley will return to UCLA for his Junior year, virtually assuring that SC will continue to be Second Class citizens in L.A. for the third year in a row It…
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POLA DISTRESS
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I see Red people — Mora hires “trojan-for-life” Kennedy Pola(malu) as Bruins’ new Running Back Coach… and just when I thought Mora really “gets it.” Sigh. Well, there it goes. UCLA Head Coach Jim Mora just let all the air out of my bubble of joy. I was riding…