Nothing Strange about THIS Love

Just What the Doctor Ordered:  Sun Devils don’t shine in Pauley, as Love and Shipp dissect ASU, 84-51, but it’s already time to start prepping for U of A, who just Kevorkianed usc 80-69 

“You better call up the ambulance,
I’m — deep in shock;
Overloaded, Baby, 
I can hardly walk…

Somebody get me a Doctor!”

Oh what a night!  The Bruins win big, and the trOJans lose big, at Galen.  That would be more than enough to make any evening a success, but THIS particular night had a few more good things going for it.

The joyous night began with the UCLA Spirit Squad returning to the Student Store to meet fans, sign posters, and pose for photos.  This new tradition is the best thing to ever happen to the Book Store — Wait, make that “to ANY Book Store.”  There are a few games left, and we urge you to come and take advantage of this unique opportunity, to meet the girls — and guys — behind the Magic.

Tonight we met one of the Male Cheerleaders, and we were blown away.  Not anything like you might have expected, especially if you get your reality from Will Ferrell and Saturday Night Live.  This guy is built like a Marine, has the intense focus and drive of a Marine, and the Class of a Marine.  Guess why.  And he says that UCLA Cheerleader Boot Camp was just as tough as the real one.  Okay, no he didn’t.  In fact, after everything that he’s been through, even a nighttime trip to the Galen Center wouldn’t scare him (like it would any normal person).  All we can say is that next time some psychotic trOJan tries to murder us, we hope this guy is close by.  And if you were still trying to hold onto a “certain” misconception about male Cheerleaders, there is a certain female Squadmember who would sternly set you straight, at least about “the man with the crown.”

(We seriously hope that NO BRUIN takes offense at that last paragraph.  If you do, then you must be reading it wrong, i.e. in those cases where it isn’t a MIS-conception, there would be nothing wrong with that anyway).

But the pre-game meet and greet and the on-court slaughter are still not the whole story.   Here’s the best part:  We lucked into a great ticket, that had a fantastic vantage point for photography, as well as an intelligent, well-informed Bruin Basketball fan to sit next to.  Oh, and did we mention that she was a beautiful Doctor-to-be (hence, today’s headlines)? 

We are SO used to sitting next to fat, sloppy, nacho-snorting idiots/trojans who don’t know one player from another, but who still torture surrounding fans with their own play-by-play, that we would be thrilled to be next to empty seats.  So it’s not like the bar is set really high.  However, could you imagine Jennifer Love Hewitt stepping right out of a Hanes commercial (well, not wearing just underwear) and taking the seat next to you?  And then she’s not stuck up, or rude, or ignorant about Russell Westbrook?

What an unexpected pleasure.  And we don’t mean any of this in a weird way —  Her Parents (who graduated from UCLA around the same time we did) came and joined us in the Second Half.  We are just trying to say “thanks,” for making the game so enjoyable, and we are going to “think positive” about her upcoming hopes and dreams on her way to becoming a Medicinal Legend.  She certainly cured something on Thursday night — Our Chronic Disappointment at our “seat neighbors.” 

She was especially knowledgeable about Russell Westbrook, who once again contributed a highlight-reel play, with a sweeping shot block from behind.  Russell had 4 Steals, 10 Points, and 7 Assists in a solid all-around game, as he and Darren Collison combined for 17 Assists and only 1 Turnover.  Collison’s funk is a thing of the past, as he added 14 Points and 2 Steals.  Also “back” is Josh Shipp, who scored 21 including 5 of 8 from Downtown. 

But it’s still Kevin Love that is making it all happen.  Love scored 20 and pulled down 10 Rebounds, and excited fans with a full-court Assist after a MADE Sun Devil basket.  The Bruin Offense worked better than ever before against a Zone, with Love getting lots of touches, and the Guards getting open shots because of that fact.

The Sun Devils made one little run in the First half to cut a 17 point lead down to 10, but then the Bruins went on a huge flurry to take a 22-point lead into the Locker Room.  The key stat is FG%:  The Bruins were at 66% after three-quarters of the game — It’s tough to beat ANY team that’s doing that, let alone the Bruins in Pauley.

The only problem of the night was a MEDICAL one (no, not our broken heart):  Lorenzo Mata hurt his wrist, and reportedly couldn’t make a fist after the game.  Losing Mata for the Arizona game would be critical, as the ‘Cats’ semi-easy victory over sc proves.  Arizona is the hottest team in the West right now, with Chase Budinger really flourishing, and the Bruins will need all their big men to be available, if they intend on continuing the streak that began after that distasteful wake-up call a couple of weeks ago.

Okay, so here are 20 photos (as promised), with captions, enlargability, and a special favoritism shown to Russell Westbrook (for the Doc).  As far as favoritism for the Cheerleaders — NOT THIS TIME.  Out of hundreds and hundreds of photos, only a fraction of them came out “un-blurry.”  There is not enough light in Pauley.  So, the shots that we choose to share are selected because they are the “crispest” shots we could get — Not because we are in love with one particular girl more than another.  And don’t give us any crap… or we’ll be referring you to the Marines.  The Few.  The Proud.  The Totally Cool.  Go Bruins!

   Are you old enough to remember Burt Reynolds’ Cosmo centerfold?   

“Get your poster.”  What else possibly needs to be said, other than:  She could BE the “Poster Girl” for Posters!

“Alright Josephine — Drop and give me twenty!!”

“I’d LOOOOOVE you to LOVE me…”  (Ain’t talkin’ ’bout [K]Love)

This one’s for a doctor who’s a sight for sore eyes.

Russell Westbrook:  More “hops” than Rolling Rock

It wouldn’t be taking anything away from Aboya to say that no one takes anything away from Aboya

“Doctor Doctor Please, Oh the mess I’m In…She walked up to me, And really stole my heart…”  (Easy folks — They are just lyrics from UFO!  Don’t turn “…paranoid — That’s not a situation, for a n-nervous boy”)

That Gatorade towel magically replenishes everything that Darren sweats out

“Doctor, My Eyes… Tell me what is real.  I hear their cries.  Just saying it’s too late for me.”  It may be too late for Jackson Browne, but not for Chritine Nubla, and not for us.

That’s why our Basketball careers ended:  We kept getting “detoured” coming out of the locker room.  [We were gonna say “waylaid,” but were afraid you’d take it wrong.]

“Look for the buried treasure under the big W”  It’s a Mad, Mad, Mad, Mad, Sun Devil World, as the Bruins rack up another big W.

The Doc gave the girl on the left her seal of approval.

The all-time Classic Outfit (pun intended, as usual)

“Pretty in Pink”  [The most obvious Headline EVER!]

Is this outfit a tribute to crosstown rival “Pink” Floyd?


Even our Gumby action figures don’t bend that well.  Or for the younger Gen.:  Insert Futurama’s “Bender” in for Gumby.  “I am Bender - Please insert girder.”

Since they’re not going to Galen, they can stop practicing “putting their hands up” in preparation for getting mugged

Now that’s what we call a “Victory Dance.”

“A Jewish Doctor, you say?”  (That one’s just for M. L.  Thanks again!)  For everyone else, thanks for coming, and come back for more tomorrow!



7 responses to “CALLING DR. LOVE”

  1. Corb Avatar

    The short brunette on the dance team never gets any love. She is the most gorgeous dance team member I have seen in a long time. Her freckles are to die for

  2. Sam Avatar

    I believe you are referring to Jamie and yes, she is a big hidden gem in the dance team

  3. Chuck Findley Avatar
    Chuck Findley

    Trojan Hater,

    When mine eyes, first beheld Elise, that instant was I turned into a hart, and my desires, like fell and cruel hounds, ere since pursue me! TH, any chance you can set up a meeting? You know my devotion to the UCLA cheerleaders, your site, and all things Bruin, You let me down at Christmas but now, Valentines Day is coming up. Tell Elise how much I worship her. Jamie is the second hottest brunette on the dance team. Elise is the best! You’ve done the Asian fest when Chow was given a second chance, you’ve done the blonds when Neuheisel was hired, now give the brunettes their just and proper due! I could go for one week of every single shot of the hot Elise that you have. Anyway, how can I order the autographed posters? Your devoted fan,


  4. t-h Avatar

    Attn Sports Fans:

    As we have PROVEN this week, we SUCK at identifying which girl is which. We aren’t even sure who you all are talking about now. We check the photos on the Official site, but there have been mistakes there in the past, and we still aren’t sure of anything after leaving the site. Besides, we don’t like to compare or “rank” the girls AGAINST one another – That just makes for negative feelings.

    We will happily feature any girl in a pictorial just for you, but you have to specifically show us which person you are requesting. Refer to one of our photos – Don’t just use a name.

    If you want a signed poster, and you can’t get to campus, try their Official Site (linked from our Home page). If you have no luck, write us again, and we can physically pick one up for you, then mail it out.

    As for telling Elise how much you worship her, you probably just did, as we are told that the Squad is aware of what is being posted about them on this site.

  5. Howard Levy Avatar
    Howard Levy

    I am the proud father of the intelligent, talented and beautiful young doctor-to-be who sat next to you at the game. She grew up in a household devoted to UCLA Basketball. Maybe someone on the UCLA Med School Admissions committee will notice her application!

  6. Wow, nice blog….

  7. The pen is really mightier than the sword, as you have proven here….