TREY MAGNIFIQUE

Bruin Cornerback Trey Brown, who snatched two Beaver passes, is the 4th Bruin in 5 weeks to win Pac-10 Player of the Week

You already knew what BROWN could do for you, but on Saturday, he showed everyone else.

As predicted here last week, Trey Brown was able to take advantage of Oregon State’s Turnover-happy Offense. Brown got not one but two Interceptions against OSU, giving him 3 of the Bruins’ 5 Interceptions this season. He also led the team in Tackles with 8.

Week after week, UCLA’s opponents have tried to work on Trey Brown…

usually with no success. It is mystifying to Brown, and to us, why this trend continues. But as long as it does, Brown will continue to rack up the accolades. This week, he was named the Pac-10 DEFENSIVE Player of the Week for his all-around efforts in Corvallis.

Every single game the Bruins have won, they have earned a similar honor, with Ben Olson, Aaron Perez, and Matthew Slater preceding Trey.

And Trey Brown wasn’t the only Bruin D-Back to shine this Weekend. Jarrad Page, now with Kansas City, made a spectacular, game-saving pass-deflection in the end zone to keep San Diego from coming back to beat the Chiefs. Page also led the team in Tackles with 9, AND, he forced a fumble. The SECOND LEADING Tackler was also a BRUIN: Linebacker Donnie Edwards, who had 8.

The Bruin Duo led the Chiefs back from a 10-point deficit to beat the Chargers 30-16. What makes that extra special is that the Chargers are Coached by Norv Turner (at least they were when this was posted), and Turner spent NINE YEARS at usc — Not as a student, but as an Assistant Coach. That’s enough to qualify him as a trojan, because, how could you be a personal witness to all their criminal activity, and not blow the whistle or at least walk away? Hopefully, San Diego’s woeful start will get the hapless Turner fired, so that we can go back to rooting for the closest thing L.A. has to a Pro Football team, unless you count the paid-to-play current tenants of the Coliseum.

While several Bruins had memorable weeks. several trojans had forgettable ones. Ex-trojan and current Eagle Winston Justice (the Prostitute & pellet gun guy) got used and abused on Sunday night. It was noticed by various members of the National Press: Justice was trying to block a guy that made Justice look foolish for 60 minutes. Even Eagle opponent Michael Strahan commented about how badly Justice needed help.

Justice’s humiliating effort was sandwiched between Matt Leinart getting benched in favor of Kurt Warner, and then responding with 93 yards passing and ZERO TD’s on Sunday. Warner threw for more yards AND a TD, and led Arizona to a huge upset victory versus Pittsburgh. After the game, Whine-art earned his nickname, complaining about sharing time with Warner. Whiny Dancer should bite his tongue, because there is NO ONE not wearing Cardinal & Gold shades that would start Leinart over Warner right now, so if he’s not SHARING time, he’s sitting on the pine.

And on Monday night, Leinart’s Buddy – and mentor – Carson Palmer also had a night he’d like to forget. His once highly-touted Bengals fell to 1-3 after geting dismantled by New England, 34-13. Palmer threw two horrible INT’s and only 1 TD, despite being in the friendly confines of his Home Stadium, rocking for a Monday Night.

On the not-so-blindly-biased side of things, he WAS going up against the best team in the League, who hasn’t even been challenged this year. Also, Oakland Raider and former trojan Justin Fargas had a career game with 179 yards rushing… So let’s turn to Baseball:

Bruin Garrett Atkins and the Colorado Rockies eliminated trojan Morgan Ensberg and the San Diego Padres last night, when the Rockies scored the winning run without ever touch Home Plate. In the bottom of the 13th inning, Colorado was down 8-6, but hit 4 straight scorchers off Hall of Fame Reliever Trevor Hoffman, and none of them were caught. However, the fourth one was fielded and thrown in beautifully, and the Catcher blocked the plate. The Runner slid past, and the Ump made an extremely delayed safe signal, ending the game. The ball came loose, but the Catcher grabbed it and would have tagged the Runner out.

It’s probably moot, because Trevor Hoffman wasn’t going to get anyone out all night, and since he was allowed to stay in after the first 3 rockets, he probably would have stayed in for 5.

Speaking of rockets, Atkins hit one that was a Home Run, but the Umps called it a Double. Maybe he can get it back against Philadelphia, the Rockies’ next opponent, where it will be Atkins against Utley. The Phillies’ best hitter, All-Star 2nd Basman Chase Utley, is also a Bruin star. Joining those two in the Playoffs is Arizona’s Bruin Eric Byrnes, a regular Starter, and Cleveland’s Bruin Ben Francisco, a Reserve who might or might not see the Field.

Compared to UCLA’s 3 Starters and 1 Reserve, sc has only 1 Starter, Jaque Jones in Chicago, along with Diamondback Reserve has-been Jeff Cirillo, and Yankee Reserve Pitcher Ian Kennedy who made it to the Playoffs. They also have two Pitchers on Playoff Teams who are on the Disabled List: Arizona’s Randy “Broken Unit” Johnson and the Cubs’ Mark “Pre-existing Condition” Prior.

Okay, so in case you get stuck watching some Baseball this month, now you know whom to root for, and whom to root against.

Below are 4 more new Cheer Shots (for no reason whatsoever).