Ya gotta have cart:  Arrogant trojan Agent/Student asks $150,000 for his cart; He then announces that he’ll rep several trojans next week, but doesn’t have any agreements in place (because that would be an NCAA violation);  Meanwhile, a whole classroom of trojans watch a man collapse but do nothing to help him

Even though their beloved football team is the worst they’ve had in ten years, and even though the shame of harsh NCAA sanctions is hanging over their heads, the trojans continue to grow more and more arrogant.  Teague Egan, the student and certified NFL Agent who got Dillon Baxter suspended, is a perfect example.  His First Round Enterprises golf cart, which usc never approved for use on campus, and about which he was WARNED not to use to give rides to players, is now for sale on eBay.  Buy it now, for $150 Grand.  Egan says that he is selling it to avoid any further violations, but does this greedy, spoiled brat — whose father founded the second rate rent-a-car company “Alamo” — really think that his brush with the NCAA makes his cart worth six figures?

Egan says that his dreams and aspirations are bigger than anyone you’ve ever met.  Do his dreams include getting usc the Death Penalty for committing NCAA violations while sc is already on Probation?  Forget about the $5 golf cart ride — Now he is claiming (to T.J. Simers, no less) that he will sign deals with a bunch of current trojan football players, as soon as Sunday, the first day after their season ends.  However, he insists that he has no verbal agreements right now, with any of them.  So either he has epic false confidence, or he is just covering up more violations.  If it were found out that he had already made arrangements to be the Rep for any of these players, the usc Football Program would probably be disbanded for two years by the NCAA.  So instead, he will just miraculously sign all these guys to contracts out of the blue, hours after it is legal to do so.  Right.

The self-absorbed Egan, who claims that what he has done already is “revolutionary,” is the only NFL Agent who is still a student, because of a loophole in the rules.  He says that his life has included sufficient negotiating experience to get around the NFL’s requirement of an advanced degree.  Apparently, Egan has several FAILED attempts to create other businesses and business deals under his belt, so the NFL looked the other way when he registered without the proper education.  SO… do you think DADDY had anything to do with this?  Simers says that “Mr. Alamo” bankrolled Egan’s efforts to become the next Drew Rosenhaus.  Therefore, the first thing any true Bruin needs to do is immediately BOYCOTT Alamo Rent-a-Car.  Don’t call yourself a UCLA fan, and then contribute to company that was founded by someone who is complicit in usc’s atmosphere of non-compliance, which has been ruining College Football (and trying to ruin College Basketball) for decades.

Add Alamo Rent-a-Car to Public Storage Co., which is owned by a real SCumbag, who took dirt from UCLA’s football field to put on the ground of his stables, so that his racehorses can do their business all over the Bruin turf.  I would tell you to also boycott Girls Gone Wild, because it is owned by an “alleged” tax-evading, child-molesting, d-bag trojan, but I know that some urges just can’t be controlled.  However, there are plenty of other sources of pseudo-porn, many for free on the Internet, so you really shouldn’t buy any GGW DVD’s — not if you want to claim that you are a true trojan-hater.

To really understand what it means to be a trojan, you should ask Bill Nye The Science Guy.  Recently, Nye was giving a lecture at usc, when he had what appeared to be a seizure, and collapsed on the stage, in front of a hall full of trojan “students.”  And reportedly, instead of coming to his aid, the students grabbed their smart phones, and started Tweeting about the incident, and taking photos of the fallen speaker.  So Nye is either writhing on the floor, or just out cold and possibly dead, and all the trojans care about is being the first to report it to their social networks.  CLASSIC usc.  Too bad Egan wasn’t there — He could have loaded Nye onto his golf cart and transported him to a hopsital, and then signed him to a contract to represent him.

And too bad that UCLA’s football team is probably not equipped to hurt the trojans where they live — On the football field.  Despite the uncertainty concerning Matt Barkley’s availability for Saturday’s game, the trojans are FAVORED by six and a half points to win on Saturday night.

And one last embarrassing “news item” concerning an ex-trojan:  On Monday Night Football, while the Arizona Cardinals were getting killed by lowly San Francisco, TV cameras caught Cardinal QB Derek Anderson and teammate (and former trojan) Deuce Lutui, yucking it up on the sidelines, as if they didn’t taking their humiliating loss seriously.  When Anderson was questioned about the incident during the postgame Press Conference, he totally went ballistic, screaming at the reporter about how he puts his heart and soul into the game, and then he stormed out of the room.  Maybe Deuce was joking with Anderson about how the NCAA was “buying” Egan’s fabrications, or about how a guy almost died at sc while a room full of students Tweeted about it instead of helping.  Hilarious, isn’t it?  

[T-H’s NOTE:  Special thanks to “Josephine Bruin” (not the mascot I don’t think, but just a die-hard UCLA fan), who sent in the information about Egan, and about his cart going on eBay.]

[T-H’s Note #2:  Michael Egan, Teague’s Dad, is NOT the OWNER of Alamo Rental Cars as T.J. Simers claims, but apparently, he was the FOUNDER.  So go ahead and boycott, for the same reason that I still don’t like Carl’s Jr., even though their Nazi-sympathizing Founder is now dead.]




  1. El Cajon Bruin Avatar
    El Cajon Bruin

    Alamo is owened by Enterprise Rent-A-Car


    [T-H’s Note: Leave it to T.J. Simers to get sh!t wrong. Michael Egan is the FOUNDER of Alamo, but no longer the Owner. But I still won’t use them ever again. He may still have stock in the company, or at least some interest in seeing them do well. So f*ck ’em. Thanks for the correction, and if you are a current Alamo employee, I’m sorry if my personal boycott hurts YOUR interests.]

  2. JosephineBruin Avatar

    YEAH BABY! love the info about Nye the science guy and Alamo. BOYCOTT BABY!!
    We are so going to take down the toejams staurday night. GO BRUINS GO… this site!

  3. JosephineBruin Avatar

    just found this gem……..that teague guy on “college cribs”. the end made me want to throw up when he started talking about girls leaving his place “walk of shame”, but the very end is funny ’cause it shows him putting gas and riding the golf cart. he’s that typical toejam guy who i wouldn’t give the time of day to after i got to know him. but the parties/drinks sound fun at the beginning…then u realize he’s an A hole!

  4. El Cajon Bruin Avatar
    El Cajon Bruin

    Nope – I’m a former Enterprise employee. Boycott away – no skin off my nose.