Smithsonian:  HOMER Simpson?  Sure!  O.J. Simpson?  No thank you!

O.J. donates his “Acquittal Suit” to the Smithsonian, but the Institute tells the institutionalized ex-trojan to keep his pants on (good advice where HE is)

In the last few days, there has been a flurry of activity in O.J.’s camp, but things at the Smithsonian couldn’t have been Stiller.  Despite a generous offer from the disputed-joint owners of the suit that O.J. Simpson was wearing when the worst jury verdict in U.S. History was announced, the Smithsonian Institute is refusing to exhibit the duds of the Human Dud.

There have been 13 years of legal wrangling over who had the “rights” to the infamous suit.  Fred Goldman has been trying to attain the suit, to sell it, in order to help cover the millions owed to his family by O.J..  However, O.J.’s manager was probably trying to milk something out of it, to secretly funnel more funds to the Juice, without Goldman or the Browns getting any of it like they are suppoed to.  But the decided-upon compromise, with O.J. signing off on it, was to donate the suit to the Smithsonian, with no financial profit for anyone involved. 

And once again, a trojan is the victim of his own arrogance.  O.J.’s delusions of grandeur were shattered, when the Smithsonian made it perfectly clear that they have no interest whatsoever in continuing the absurd glorification of a double-murderer who skated on technicalities.  The Smithsonian obviously has a little class.  Unfortunately, not all museums do, so I’m sure that Simpson’s mob will ultimately find a taker.  And if not, maybe they should just call Heritage Hall.  I’m positive that usc would gladly display the suit, just like they display his jersey in the Coliseum.  No one was MORE PROUD than O.J.’s trojan family, when the Juice beat the system.

No one has embraced the criminal element quite like usc.  Miami of the past, and Oregon at present might get (dis)Honorable Mentions, but sc gets the trophy.  And to further cement usc’s Felonious Funk,  Lane Kiffin has recently hired two Football Assistants — BOTH allegedly with heinous criminal pasts:

Yesterday, Kiffin hired HIS BROTHER, Christopher, who was once arrested for Burglary.  Apparently wasted on drugs AND alcohol, Chris broke into two different vans, to steal money and CD’s.  Snoop Dogg CD’s?  Adam Lambert?  Chris will be Lane’s new Defensive Administrative Assistant.  “Hey Chris — Go get me some coffee… Preferably NOT out of someone else’s vehicle.  Thanks, Bro”

And Kiffin’s love of “ex-cons” isn’t just a matter of nepotism.  Lane also recently hired Tennessee’s Secondary Coach Willie Mack Garza  to be an Assistant Coach at usc.  Kiffin must have been impressed with Garza’s resume, which includes a nasty DUI, that escalated into fleeing the scene of an injury accident, possibly leaving a crash victim bleeding in the street.  Garza was caught, and refused a blood test.  Sounds like a perfect fit for Kiffin and the trojans.

Speaking of perfect fits, incoming trojan Basketball recruit Curtis Washington just got thrown off  — or quit — his High School team… in the middle of a game.  Apparently, he got into it with his Coach, went right to the locker room, and then dumped his uniform on the ground outside the Coach’s office door.  sc sure can pick ’em.

And if they aren’t arrogant when they come in, they apparently are when they get out.  Ex-trojan Tight End Anthony McCoy is participating in the workouts for prospective NFL Draftees, and said that he doesn’t want to be compared to All-Time Greats Antonio Gates and Tony Gonzalez.  He says that he has the same tools that those two future Hall of Famers have, but that he wants to be better than either one of them.  You COULD read that as just healthy wishful thinking, supreme self-confidence, and youthful exuberance… OR… You could read it correctly, as DISRESPECT for two legends, and typical trojan delusional arrogance.

This week, while all these above-mentioned trojans suffered pain, shame, and ridicule, several Bruins received publicity too, but for GOOD things.  Darren Collison scored a career-high THIRTY-FIVE points against Dallas;  Russell Westbrook poured in 30 Points with 13 Assists in an OKC victory;  Jordan Farmar has hit 68% of his shots in his last 3 games, and scored 19 (on 8-for-10 shooting) in the Lakers’ win on Tuesday night over the Pacers;  In that same game, Earl Watson tallied 10 Assists, getting SEVEN on the FIRST 7 baskets made by Indiana;  And finally, Jackie Robinson got some meaningful and very public praise, when Sandy Koufax came out of his three decades of semi-seclusion.  Koufax, during a charity event, told the World that when he was just coming in with the Dodgers, he was a bit of an outcast — Not because he was Jewish, but because he was a young, highly-paid, UNPROVEN hotshot — and Bruin Jackie Robinson was the only guy who DIDN’T treat him like an outsider.  Even Gil Hodges was a jerk to Koufax.  Jackie, who knows more about being an outcast than anyone else in the History of Sports, was all Class, and helped Koufax get acclimated in the Dodger clubhouse.  And as soon as Koufax got his first win, thus proving himself, Hodges and everyone else accepted him into the fold.  Only the Bruin Robinson behaved like a kind and mature human being right from Day 1.

After hearing all these trojan and Bruin stories, aren’t you glad you’re not a trOJan?  

Final Notes:  The late night comedians weighed in on O.J. tonight.  After hearing about O.J.’s generous donation, Jimmy Fallon is surprised, and reflects:  “It turns out O.J.’s a good guy.”  Meanwhile, David Letterman compliments the choice of the Acquittal Suit as the item to be donated… since it was the only thing that wasn’t bloody.  And Dave goes on to say that it wasn’t O.J.’s only donation:  He also donated his knife to the L.A. sewer system.