LAW & ORDER: SUV

Will “Rover-gate” finally throw usc to the (NCAA) dogs?  After an L.A. Times Reporter allegedly caught Joe McKnight Red-and-Gold-handed repeatedly driving a Marketing guy’s Land Rover, the trojan Tailback denies it, but usc actually contradicts him

Who’s lying?  A Reporter for the Los Angeles Times?  Usc’s Starting Tailback?  Usc’s Sports Information Director?  They can NOT all be telling the truth.  It looks like Christmas has come early for the NCAA.

The NCAA now has another brick in the wall, that spans a mile high, and could come crumbling down on usc any second.  And this time, it wasn’t the Journalistic juggernaut Yahoo Sports that fed it to them, it was none other the the Los Angeles Times.  It looks like no one will be calling it the Trojan Slimes for a while, if any of these new allegations stick.

According to the Times, Joe McKnight has been seen several times driving an expensive Land Rover SUV that he does not own.  Research has uncovered that the vehicle actually belongs to a guy in the Marketing business, who owns a web address “4joemcknight.com.”  So it sounds like it’s Reggie Bush all over again, with a wannabe Agent giving extra benefits to a star trojan football player.

The guy knows about McKnight, because he is the Boss to McKnight’s Baby Mama.  Joe has a 10-month old, and claims that the SUV belongs to the child’s Mother’s Boss.  Joe claims that he has ridden in the SUV, but has never driven it.  According to the venerable (at least in legal matters like this) Los Angeles Times, McKNIGHT IS TELLING A BLATANT LIE.  They have seen him drive it to or from practice right on campus more than once.

Basically speaking, it would be an NCAA violation if McKnight is driving a vehicle like that without paying for it, if the donor is a booster, or in the Agent/Marketing business.  McKnight would be considered ineligible, perhaps from the point where it can be proven that he was driving the car.

And if you think that sc can pull off the ol’ “We didn’t know about the car” Defense, the Times says that the Coaches all saw the vehicle, parked with the hazard lights flashing, right outside the practice field gates.  They even said hi to the Baby Mama.  So sc will need another Defense… and wait, they’ve got one. 

According to McKnight, he never “signed up” the car with sc, which is what you have to do, so they always know what you are driving.  Well, the trojan’s Bagdad Bob of a Sports Information Director says that McKnight is MISTAKEN, and that he did indeed sign the SUV up with usc. 

You have GOT to be kidding me.  Do they really expect anyone to believe that McKnight just FORGOT about signing documents with the Athletic Department about the fact that he will now occasionally be driving a Land Rover?  Not only that, but this would be the second time we are supposed to swallow a McKnight Amnesia Moment.  During his recruitment, he said that he talked to Reggie Bush and Pete Carroll on a conference call.  But when they informed him that THAT would be an NCAA Violation, he changed his story and — as coached — claimed that it never happened.

I want to re-iterate:  Everything in this article (and the whole site) is ALLEGED, and solely OPINION (and therefore PROTECTED).  Of course, I bet that now EVERYONE outside of Figueroa Trade Tech shares a very similar opinion.

It’s these CAR deals that always seem to get the NCAA off their asses.  Bruin DeShaun Foster got in bad trouble a while back for an SUV, at Oklahoma there was a Rhett Bomar – Car Dealership problem, and even Ronnie Lott’s car dealership was under suspicion at one point.  Maybe this will be the hard evidence the NCAA needed to finally wrap a bow around their “Lack of Institutional Control” VERDICT against usc…

…Which would make Joe McKnight our McKnight in Shining cArmor.  And all thanks to a MAJOR Christmas Miracle:  The L.A. Times got off THEIR asses, and got the scoop on a story that hurts their heroes.  The stories have been everywhere, as Yahoo and the “Tarnished Heisman” guys turned up “illegal” receipts galore, but the Times has always brought up the rear.  Even ESPN — from the East Coast — has been more interested in usc’s evildoings.

But the Times just couldn’t ignore it any longer, and finally cracked a story — and it’s a huge one.  Because not only will McKnight go down, but the whole house of cards will collapse, and Carroll AND Garrett will be gone.  Unless, of course, Tessalone’s (alleged) scam works, and people believe (thanks to backdated documentation?) that McKnight registered the vehicle in advance, and was just lying because he’s a compulsive liar who can’t help himself, or was just so nervous and confused that signing up the vehicle — and DRIVING it — completely slipped his mind. 

“Team of the Decade?”  Yeah right, Sports Illustrated.  You guys should pull that designation from your web site right now, in the face of yet ANOTHER piece of hard evidence that sc PAYS thier players, and it’s been going on for the entire decade.  None of the difference-makers would have gone to that cesspool, when they could have gone to beautiful Florida or Football-crazy Texas instead, IF IT WEREN’T FOR THE LAND ROVERS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Every school does it, you say?  Yeah, well, not nearly to the extent that sc does.  They are notorious for it, they are on Magazine Covers flaunting it, and now it’s time to pay.  Luckily for the NCAA, the trojans aren’t involved in a BCS Bowl, so they can strike right now.  Apparently, sc’s Emerald Bowl pays less than the EagleBank Bowl.

The new sc Recruiting campaign might consist of telling prospects that they can drive luxury SUV’s, and hang around with Gangsta Rap Stars (accused murderers), and Agents… right up until the end of the REGULAR season, since a Bowl Ban will be in effect for their entire careers.

C’mon, NCAA.  What else can you possibly be waiting for??  Will you please dust off the old Death Penalty and APPLY it already?!  It’s what this web site is all about, and what I have been pushing for, since the site’s inception.  So, JUST DO IT, so I can retire from this nasty, nasty business already!

I can almost taste the Justice.

 DISCLAIMER:  The above was an exercise in wishful thinking.  I am sure usc will pay off all the right people in order to completely avoid sanctions, and continue to defy the laws of decency with their blatant and ongoing disrespect for Law & Order.