Dedicated to the HATRED of all things trOJan


Double-Secret Probation:  Ex-trojan LenDale White gets cut, and Mr. “Trogan” Markeith Ambles is declared academically ineligible

It makes me wanna shout.  So much natural ability, completely wasted.  U$C products LenDale White and Markeith Ambles have both come up short this week, as White lost his spot on the roster of the Denver Broncos, and Ambles lost his eligibility to play in 2011.

White, who scored 24 Touchdowns for the Tennessee Titans from ’06-’09 in a promising Pro career beginning, has often been accused of being lazy, fat and out of shape, lacking the character and dedication to work hard.  He once even blamed his relative obesity on his love of Tequila. After the Titans had no further patience for him, he wound up in Denver, but a serious Achilles injury stopped his 2010 season before it started.  There is no certainty that his weak work ethic kept him from coming back from the injury, just as there is no evidence that his being out of shape led to the injury in the first place.  Carrying too much of a load doesn’t necessarily translate into tearing a tendon.  So maybe it’s just bad luck for LenDale.  I never like to take any joy in an injury, unless it is self-inflicted.

If White has turned over a new leaf and is willing to persevere with hard work, he is bound to get another chance in the League.  He used to be a powerful runner, and 24 TD’s even got him some Fantasy Football love.  Maybe ex-trojans Jack Del Rio, HC in Jacksonville, or Mike  Homgren, GM in Cleveland, will give White one more opportunity… to disappoint.  White already burned his bridge with former buddy Pete Carroll, telling him “F You” in the Press after getting cut by Carroll’s Seahawks.

And speaking of disappointing, just how surprised can you really be that the guy who spelled it “T-r-o-g-a-n-s” would have trouble in college?  Ordinarily, Lane Kiffen and the U$C Football machine would have figured out a way to upgrade an Animal House-like 0.0 GPA, but last week in the trojans’ Football Practice, several new Wide Receivers excelled, making Markeith superfluous.  And just days after George Farmer and the rest of the new WR hires impressed the hell out of Kiffin & Co., Ambles is declared officially ineligible for 2011, and may even get booted from the school.

However, on Tuesday, those same hotshot Receivers came down with a serious case of The Drops, even getting bawled out by prima donna QB Matt Barkley.  So does that mean that Markeith just got a reprieve?  Should he amble back out to the practice field?  Will a clerical error by a test-grader suddenly come to light?  Is Mr. Trogan really an Honors Student?  Doubtful.  Some cases are too blatant for even U$C to “fix.”  Next stop for Ambles:  The Myami Hurrikanes?

And speaking of Miami and all these new allegations of improprieties — The trojan fans are going to start making comparisons, trying to downplay their own violations in comparison to what was going on in South Beach:  “We may have cheated, but not as much as THEY did.”    Don’t believe it for a second.  All the same stuff that Miami is accused of was “allegedly” happening at sc too — The parties, the hookers, the payoffs, the free trips and free lodging — and it’s all been going on since the 70’s.  So when the trojans start to whine if the Hurricanes don’t get hit with worse punishments, just laugh, and tell them they’re lucky none of THEIR boosters ever got busted in a $930 Million Ponzi scheme, forcing them to come clean with the Feds.

"FAT, DRUNK, AND STUPID IS NO WAY TO GO THROUGH LIFE" was published on August 17th, 2011 and is listed in News from the Dark Side.


  1. dswenson wrote,

    Ambles needs to sign up for Sra. Ross’s Spanish class and ballroom dancing so he can watch his GPA soar.

    As far as $c cheating, it has been going on since the fifties. Mc Kay was better than Cheatey Petey at not getting caught. $c should have be given the death penalty, instead they got their little wrist slapped.

    As far as Cabana boy, Matt Barkley, he is a “BRAT”. He acts like he is so cool in his interviews. He is the biggest FAKE around. He is so $c.

    As far as White goes, what do you expect, he is from $c.

    As far as $c alums go, they would never rat on their place (I can’t even call it a school).

  2. Rick wrote,

    Anxiously awaiting the remake starring Pat Haden as Dean Wormer, Markeith “has no grade point average”
    Ambles as D Day, and, of course, LenDale as Flounder…

  3. JosephineBruin wrote,

    great article!

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