DIDDLER ON THE ROOF

Tradition?  Tradition!  — SC student gets busted for saying “L’Chaim to Life” by having sex on the top of a campus building between Sunrise and Sunset

If I Were A Rich Man… I wouldn’t blow my parent’s tuition by screwing on campus in plain sight, and getting thrown out of school.

I think there is a girl near usc who is about to sue her Matchmaker.  Yesterday at Figueroa Tech, a trojan student was suspended from his fraternity and allegedly tossed from school for breaking the usc code of conduct, by having  blatantly public sex on a roof on campus.  The photos of the incident are all over the Internet, meaning that just like the girl, probably, it has gone VIRAL.

A couple of years ago, usc became infamous for all the sex that was taking place in the campus BATHROOMS, including male-on-male encounters in their Men’s rooms.  But now, with no more stalls unoccupied, the students have to find new locations.  In response to this situation, the University with the ketchup & mustard colors is considering re-designing all campus buildings to have pointy roofs like the old “Der Wienerschnitzel” restaurants, in order to control all the out-of-control trojan wieners.

The identity of the student is being withheld to (ironically) protect his privacy, but has anyone seen Teague Egan or Matt Barkley on campus lately?  The girl was not an sc student, but the Adult Entertainment convention was held last weekend, a few blocks away, so maybe she was one of the girls applying for the position of “sc recruiting hostess.”

 Now that “roof access” doors on campus will all be double-bolted, the Men of Troy will be looking for new places to spawn, and I have a suggestion:  Why not use the CLASSROOMS — They might as well get SOME productive use.