BRUINS HIRE ‘HEIS FOR HIGHER HIGHS

High, high, high in the midday sun

Historic Day… for UCLA:  In a bad omen for sc, Rick Neuheisel becomes Bruin Head Coach on same day that New England completes a perfect season

WANTED:  Experienced Compliance Officer.

The UCLA Football Bruins filled their Head Coaching vacancy yesterday, selecting Bruin grad and Rose Bowl MVP Rick Neuheisel.  Athletic Director Dan Guerrero wisely allowed the search to go for 26 days, while interesting names like Mike Martz and John Fox were explored.  So now, no one can say that Guerrero snatched up the eager Neuheisel too quickly, without testing out the waters.

Regardless of the search length, this selection is still controversial.  Some fans have already refused to support the Bruins now that a “shady” character has been put in charge.  These people are NOT fans.  Sure, Rick has a shady past, but there is not ONE serious violation that any of these haters can name.  All Rick’s transgressions have been minor, and he is now alert to the issues, and won’t allow them to recur.  At least, that is what he SWORE TO yesterday in his initial set of interviews as Bruin Head Coach.

Everyone knows that the NCAA will be watching the Bruin Program closely, but we INVITE that kind of scrutiny, because we expect the Program to function 100% above-board.  And when the NCAA Compliance Agents see that everything is in perfect order in Westwood, maybe they’ll hop on the Freeway, and see what’s going on over at South Central U.  That would keep them busy, and out of Neuheisel’s hair, for years.

We are not worried about off-the-field problems.  What has us less than celebratory is the declining records of his previous college teams, and the horrendous performance of this year’s Baltimore Ravens’ Offense, which Rick is currently coordinating.

We are also worried about Defensive Coordinator Dewayne Walker bolting for Washington.  Ty Willingham has offered him a job with the Huskies, and while Rick wants him to stay, he is probably a little bitter, and perhaps intrigued by the prospect of shutting down Neuheisel’s teams for a few years, before succeeding Willingham as Head Coach up there.  Not that Ty is on his way out, but if Rick keeps his nose clean, he may not be going anywhere for decades.   

And that would be just fine with us, assuming the obvious.  We like the same things about him that everyone else does:  He won 11 games in a year – something no Bruin team has ever done – and despite this year’s results in Baltimore, he is respected as something of an Offensive Wizard.  And of course, his enthusiasm, charisma, and Recruiting Charm should change the face of UCLA Football for a long time.

The Bruins can now start thinking about National Titles instead of City Titles.  And soon, they’ll be going for undefeated seasons.  Speaking of which…

The New England Patriots pulled it off — They came back from a 12-point 3rd Quarter deficit to beat the Giants 38-35 and finish the regular season 16-0.  They are the first team to go undefeated since the 1972 Dolphins, who went on to win the Super Bowl.  Two other teams went undefeated, both Chicago Bears from before we were born, but neither of those teams won the Title.  So the Pats still have to win it all before they can really share the spotlight with the Dolphins.  The Pats did set three different NFL Records:  Most Points in a Season, Most TD Passes by a QB (Brady), and Most TD Receptions (Moss).  But the Pats had to dig out of a hole… THANKS TO A TROJAN.

Ex-trOJan and infamous racist homophobe Junior Seau missed an easy tackle on the Giants’ first TD, and then he got caught in a Bush League manuever — Sitting on an opponent and holding him down to let more time run off the clock.  The cheater was penalized five yards, and more importantly, it stopped the clock.  Soon thereafter, the Giants scored another TD, right before the Half.

Seau was ultimately bailed out by Tom Brady, Randy Moss (2 TD’s), and Wes Welker (100+ yards Receiving).  Lawrence Maroney ran for 2 TD’s, and Kevin Faulk made several huge EFFORT plays.  The Pats were down 28-16 before scoring 22 straight to take a 10-point lead with 5 miutes left.  The Giants SLOWLY marched down the field for a TD, but with 1 minute left, failed to recover an Onside Kick, ending the game.

Seau wasn’t the only Pat to show a lack of class.  Rodney Harrison, the one who got into it with Freddie Mitchell a few years ago, got caught on a late personal foul that was so bad, Bill Belichick actually pulled Harrison from the game, with 5 minutes to go and the Giants driving.  We were actually surprised that Bilichick had the cajones to take that risk, just to rub Harrison’s nose in it, so, good for Belichick, of whom we are no fans.  Hopefully, Neuheisel can emulate Belichick’s WON-LOSS RECORD, without emulating his CHEATING.  And we think he CAN (especially if Walker stays, or his replacement is equally qualified).

And speaking of cheating, here are 13 more cheerleader photos — 8 of Bruins on High, that give us a Natural High, 1 very nice fan shot, and 4 Kick Shots from the UCLA-UC Davis game, sent to us by our Most Valuable Contributor in history, Mr. bruincivil.  Oh, by the way, the Bruins beat Davis by 28 (ho-hum), failing to cover the spread by 6 and a half points in their final tune-up before facing the Northern Cal Pac-10 teams next week on the road.

[Don’t forget, especially today:  Click on photos to enlarge them.]

Some rallies are intense, some rallies are in tents, some rallies are both.

Flying High Again… Come on and join me  (Ozzy and Randy Rule!)

Rocky Mountain High

Highway to Heaven

She gets,,, she gets,,, she gets,,,HIGH

…because I was high, becuase I was high, because I was high  (afroman)

Sweet Valley High

Fast Times at Ridgmont High

They say once you go a certain way, you never go back, but for Dan Guerrero, apparently, it’s not true.

We can’t BELIEVE that UC Davis brought Cheerleaders!

You think they made the outfits themselves?

We know, we know, but it’s not as bad as CSSB, with higher GPA’s.

Do you think they ALL want to be Vets, or is that just a 20-year old UC Davis sterotype?

 

 

 

Comments

4 responses to “BRUINS HIRE ‘HEIS FOR HIGHER HIGHS”

  1. UCLADal Avatar
    UCLADal

    So I’m a “hater” because I don’t support RN as the coach of the team? I think lying to your boss is a pretty serious transgression. I think after committing 51 violations at CU, leaving to go to UW after the fact, then getting written up 3 weeks into your new tenure doesn’t show a lot of good judgement especially when you are a Head Coach. On top of that, his teams after starting out strong, become very pedestrian, a lot like Karl Dorrell’s teams. His defenses at Washington weren’t very good. He was 1-3 versus UCLA. None of his QB recruits have ever done anything special. Remember Casey Paus?

    I’m not a “hater” T-H. I’m a Bruin fan that is very passionate about UCLA football and is very concerned that after the coaching search, the best Dan Guererro could do is hire RN even after he stated that RN wasn’t a consideration when it started. Maybe he gets it done and UCLA ends up a champion of some sort. Maybe UCLA ends up on probation and we’re right back where we started. After all the praise DG gave Karl Dorrell for cleaning up the program, he then hires RN and his controversial coaching resume. Sounds like something sc would do.

  2. t-h Avatar

    Here’s how it lays out:

    You can voice your opinion that the hire was not good, and still be a fan;

    You canNOT root against him and eagerly await a transgression just so you can say I told you so, and still call yourself a fan.

    You can criticize Dan Guerrero for “settling” for a guy with issues, and still be a fan;

    You canNOT call him SCum and accuse him of purposely dragging the Program into certain Probation and still call yourself a fan.

    If we can forgive him for going to usc Law, then others should be able to forgive him for lying about an Office Pool.

    Whether we like it or not, Rick is The Man right now with the best chance of bringing the Victory Bell back to Westwood where it belongs. Why is he the best chance? Because he is here. That is enough for us to throw him our support whole-heartedly, until he does something that makes him an unworthy representative of UCLA.

    Would we EVER root against a Bruin Coach? Well, if they hired Ken Norton jr or Henry Bibby, we might take an issue with that. Hopefully, nothing like that will ever happen. Maybe if they hired a guy who used to be in the KKK, then we wouldn’t support him.

    But despite the Aryan looks, Neuheisel is NOT a Nazi to our knowledge, or a trojan, so we are absolutely SHOCKED that you are thinking of being less supportive of a Program that is obviously almost as near and dear to your heart as your family.

  3. sportsfan7 Avatar
    sportsfan7

    UC Davis may not be athletically superior to UCLA, but they would never post pictures of opposing teams and their cheerleaders with such rude and arrogant comments. They’re classier than that.

  4. t-h Avatar

    Dear Sportsfan —

    Look where you are!! You are on some obscure PARODY web site that caters mostly to drunken horny college frat boys — Of course we are going to make SLIGHTLY rude and arrogant comments. And we went back and looked at those captions, and they were not SO horrible.

    When we said that we thought they wouldn’t bring Cheerleaders, that’s because most small Programs don’t. We didn’t mean that these girls weren’t worth bringing. If we knew they were coming, we might have attended ourselves, instead of having to use someone else’s donated photos.

    We didn’t say the outfits were ugly, we just asked if they made them themselves. That doesn’t imply that they are unattractive, just that they are not as professionally crafted and tailored as UCLA’s attire. We don’t see that as such a terrible or classless insult. Furthermore, we didn’t imply that there was anything wrong with the girls. They were actually pretty cute. All we did was anticipate someone making a crack about one of the girls, and we tried to counter it by pointing out that the Davis girls are better than the last visiting team.

    And the Vet comment? Is that an insult? isn’t that what Davis is famous for, in a very respectable way? It was 20 years ago, and that was NOT some kind of veiled “dog” joke.

    We’re sorry if you are really that offended. If you look around this site a little more, you will find MUCH more offensive material than that, by design, Remember, we’re not here to stroke everybody, so someone is bound to be offended. But since you’re probably a family member, apologize to the girls for us, and send us a rebuttal from them, about their limited wardrobe budget or something, if it will make them feel better, and we will be happy to approve it for publication.