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GROUND TO A PULP IN PALO ALTO

[Not Stanford, but fitting.]

I never sausage a thing — Meating a team playing without their starting Steer-er (QB), the un-beefy UCLA Defense still manages to get butchered for 405 yards on the ground and 7 Touchdowns, including 3 by the back-up Running Back, in a 58-34 pulverizing in the Stanford Stadium Slaughterhouse, for the Bruins’ 10th straight loss to the Cardinal

Chalk this one up to Defense.  Bad Defense.  REALLY bad Defense.  Against a team that just lost to San Diego State, scoring only 17 against the Aztecs, WITH their starting Quarterback.  That was a week ago.  Then Stanford faces their favorite doormat, UCLA, loses their starting QB in the first quarter, but still scores FIFTY-EIGHT points against the Bruins.  Something is wrong at UCLA, and the blame falls squarely on the Defense.

The Offense was far from perfect, and made a dozen mistakes that could have made the game more interesting.  There was a dropped Touchdown pass, at least three other dropped passes, penalties, three or four fumbles (two lost), two Interceptions, less-than-stellar pass protection, and some errant throws.  But compared to the Defense, the Offense looked All-American.  Once again, Quarterback Josh Rosen tallied Heisman-level stats, going 40-for-60 for 480 yards and 3 TD’s.  Receivers Jordan Lasley and Caleb Wilson each caught 11 passes for 158 and 145 yards, with Lasley, Darren Andrews, and Eldridge Massington snatching TD receptions.  And even the Running Game rose from dormancy, with the return of Soso Jamabo.  In defiance of the TV announcer mispronouncing his name as “Jamobo” for half the game, Soso gained 100 yards Rushing on 12 carries, including a long of 49 and a Touchdown run.

You would think that all of that, accounting for 34 points, might be enough to at least compete with a team that put up a total of 17 against San Diego State last week.  But the Bruins Continue Reading »

MISSING DOZENS IN LAND OF KISSING COUSINS

Memphizzle — Deep down in the heart of Tennessee, the Bruins, who were missing several key starters, proceeded to miss several golden opportunities to beat Memphis, by missing 4 easy catches, missing open Receivers, missing tackles, and missing coverage on one main Tiger in 45-48 loss

Josh Rosen put up some unbelievable, Heisman-type numbers, but lost the game and the Heisman, with two BAD Interceptions, including a costly Pick 6, and an incompletion on 4th Down with a minute to go, when the Bruins were only 15 yards away from a game-tying Field Goal.  A loss to unranked Memphis, when they had two good opportunities to win, could easily lose Rosen any Heisman support he had.

So despite throwing for 463 yards and 4 TD’s, and rushing for another one, this was far from Rosen’s finest hour.  His turnovers were devastating, arising off of devastatingly bad decisions to throw.  The Bruins gained 633 Total Yards, and it wasn’t enough, thanks to the decimated Defense being unable to stop the Tigers.  Memphis gained 560 Total Yards, and QB Riley Ferguson (who?) threw SIX Touchdown passes.

A team with depth doesn’t ever have to blame losses on injuries, but Continue Reading »

PIN CUSHING

The bigger the Cushing the better the (drug) pushing — Ex-trojan and repeat offender Brian Cushing of the Houston Texans has been suspended from the NFL for the second time — this time for TEN games — for taking performance-enhancing drugs again

[Note:  For legal reasons — This article is based on reported facts, but is definitely an OPINION piece, and all sentiments expressed herein, and all conclusions drawn, are ALLEGED.]

Why is he even allowed on the field?  Ever?  This guy has stuck more needles in his ass than Keith Richards and Sid Vicious combined have stuck in their arms.

Brian Cushing looked like a roided-out freak 8 years ago at u$c, when the trojans were swimming in accusations of steroid abuse.  Cushing’s before-and-after pics made it so blatantly obvious that you would have sworn they were Photoshopped (but they weren’t).  This guy went from skinny little overachiever to monstrous hulk practically overnight, and everyone outside of Figueroa Tech knew why.  This was back in the Pete Carroll era where if you weren’t cheating, you weren’t trying.  This was the time when Dr. Ting the Steroid King was an integral part of the trojan football factory, and his sons, the Ting Brothers were on the team.  One of THEM tested positive for steroids before both brothers quit the team.

Only a blind monkey or a trojan fan could look at Cushing and not know the truth.  In fact, trojan fans did know the truth, and they applauded it.  And they weren’t the only ones loving juiced-up athletes.  In Baseball, ex-trojan Mark McGwire was Continue Reading »

HAWAIIAN NICE

Maui wowie — Surf away the Monday blues with these blue and gold-clad beauties, who make L.A. a paradise

No article.  No Irma coverage.  No pretense.  Just 42 more UCLA Spirit Squad photos from the Hawaii game… Continue Reading »

ROSEN GOES FIVE-0 ON HAWAII (PART 2, 65 MORE PHOTOS)

(Before you continue to view these 65 photos, make sure you’ve looked at the previous article first)

Continue Reading »

ROSEN GOES FIVE-0 ON HAWAII

Book ’em, Josh-o — Josh Rosen leis out FIVE Touchdowns with 0 Interceptions as Hawaii takes it on the Chin Ho, 56-23; Darren Andrews catches 3 of those 5 TD passes

No man is an island (not even Maui from “Moana”), and no one player wins a college football game all by himself.  But there is no doubt that UCLA Quarterback Josh Rosen is the LEADER of the Bruins, and he and his squad hit Hawaii like a tidal wave, putting up eight touchdowns in a 56-23 romp.

Rosen threw 5 TD passes, 3 of them to Wide Receiver Darren Andrews, as UCLA dominated the game from the outset.  Hawaii’s Defense had no answer for Rosen, who went a remarkable 22-for-25, for 329 yards.  The Bruins also did a little better on the Ground than they had been doing during the previous dozen games or so, tallying 132 yards, which was an average of 5.1 yards per carry.  There were holes to run through that have been hard to come by recently. Continue Reading »

NIGHT SHINING IN ARMOUR

Damsels in dis dress — Whether or not you are a fan of Under Armour’s new Football and Cheerleading uniforms that were unveiled on Sunday night, you’ve gotta admit:  These girls would look great even in suits of ACTUAL armour

Personally, I don’t have a super-strong opinion about Under Armour, or their new UCLA uniforms and apparel.  It’s kind of a mixed bag:  I like the more traditional shoulder stripes on the Football jerseys; I like the blue on the jersey;  I’m not that crazy about the new hue of the Football pants; I do NOT like the lighter shade of blue on the helmets (because the contrast is lower); I wish the ROAD uni’s had more blue and gold and less white;  I like that the UA deal brings in a lot of money for UCLA; I think the new Cheer outfits are fine, but I like the look of last year’s uni’s a little better, I think.  But it’s not that much of a difference, and I think I will get used to the new ones.

Sometimes when something is so iconic to me, I don’t like seeing variations.  Just like a great song.  I loved, let’s say for example, the studio version of “Stairway to Heaven.”  Then I heard the “LIVE” version, and I was not as pleased, because it differs from the studio version that was ingrained in my mind.  But the more I heard the Live version, the more okay I was with it.  So as far as the Spirit wardrobe, it’s the Heaven-ly Angels wearing it that help make it iconic and satisfying, and I’m guessing that with time, I will grow accustomed to the new versions, BECAUSE of the beauty and grace emanating from within.

On Sunday there was no pregame rally, due to fear of lightning, and then during the game, there was a cloud cover.  Due to this unfortunate confluence of events, I did not get the best-quality photos.  No close-ups, and the shots from afar were just not very crystal clear in resolution because of the paucity of direct sunlight.  Hopefully this Saturday will be better.  But in the meantime, here are 41 more Cheer shots from the A&M game, to see the uni’s and the girls who make them special. Continue Reading »

PLEASANT RALLY SUNDAY (2ND HALF OF 100 PHOTOS)

If you are just now coming to this site, please view the article below this one first.  That is where you will find a recap of the miracle COMEBACK, and the first 50 photos from the event.  Then COME BACK to THIS article, for the SECOND 50 shots. Continue Reading »

PLEASANT RALLY SUNDAY

Not their Stepping Stone — In an extremely rare Sunday game, the Bruins fall behind 44-10 late in the 3rd, then finally stop Monkee-ing around and score 35 straight points — behind Josh Rosen’s 491 Passing Yards, and 4 Passing TD’s (all 4 in the 4th quarter) along with Caleb Wilson’s school-record 15 Receptions, and 205 Receiving Yards — to pull off the greatest comeback in UCLA’s history, as Rosen’s last-minute TD pass to Jordan Lasley (pictured above!) makes it 45-44 and has Bruins fans singing “I’m a Believer”

From no rally to greatest rally ever, this ultra-bizarre day will be remembered forever.  It started in horrible fashion, and I’m not even talking about the miserable first half of Football.  Before all of that, there was a tailgating tragedy that had me infuriated.  Due to a “breaking news” weather forecast that suggested a lightning storm was heading towards Pasadena, the University decided that our beloved Spirit Squad would NOT be allowed to come out to the tailgate area for their scheduled appearances or pregame rally with the Alumni Band.  Those of you who know me understand how devastating this tragic news was to me.  This is the first time in 12 years of doing this that this has happened.  I usually have 300 photos taken before going into the stadium.

Of course, I understand being cautious.  Obviously, I don’t want any of the cheerleaders to risk their health just to entertain us.  But at the time, there were zero rain clouds in the sky, and as it turned out, there was no lightning at all, all night.  So I was dying.  EIGHT brand new girls (6 Cheer, 2 Dance), and me with no chance to capture their beauty and essence close up (in the stadium I am 30 yards away from them instead of front row center at the pregame rally).

So the afternoon started out rotten.  Oh well, Cheerleaders are only half the event.  There is also UCLA Football.  But before all the tailgaters had even found their seats in the stadium, the Bruins were already Continue Reading »

IN THE HEAT OF DENY

We’ve got Spear-it — u$c will ADMIT any millionaire, but can’t ADMIT any mistakes, denying that the statue of Shakespeare they commissioned and unveiled has his name spelled incorrectly, while also denying that their mascot Traveler is named after the horse of Confederate degenerate General Robert E. Lee

When President-for-now Trump commended people who marched shoulder-to-shoulder with Nazis and Klansmen, he got torn to shreds.  But because he is mentally unhinged, he refused to admit his mistake, instead, doubling down about the FINE torch-bearing people who were shouting racist, anti-Semitic garbage.  Just like that brain-damaged sociopath, the entire u$c organization is refusing to own up to two slightly embarrassing facts that are currently SCandalizing their campus.  The first one elicited protests, when it was discovered that the original trojan horse mascot “Traveler” was literally named after the personal steed of American traitor Robert E. Lee, prominent leader of the Confederacy, and army General fighting to keep Slavery alive.

Of course this is an overblown situation, as no fan, nor anyone currently affiliated with the school makes the connection, or considers their horse to be a tribute to Lee.  But that didn’t stop some extremely liberal folks from complaining.  They apparently got swept up in the recent Confederate Statue fervor, and are demanding that the University change the name of the horse, in order to stop “honoring” the concept of fighting against the Emancipation Proclamation.  Even I don’t think these demands have merit.  However, the trojan brain trust can’t even frame their position properly without just DENYING the facts.  Instead, they are hitching their horse cart to the fact that Lee’s “Traveller” was spelled with a second “L,” while Continue Reading »

ROSEN ASSETS

Variable Interest Rate — Coming off a 4-8 season, expectations for return on investment are low, until you see Josh Rosen’s leadership, mechanics, and pinpoint accuracy accrue, and then you get your hopes up again that UCLA’s stock will rise

As racial tension rises in the Country, and nuclear tension rises internationally due to a severe lack of diplomacy, it is a miracle that the Stock Exchanges continue to thrive.  Let’s take this as a metaphor for UCLA Football.  The O-line is coming off its worst year in memory, the record was a dismal 4-and-8, and there are no super-frosh, immediate impact saviors coming in to Lonzo Ball the Bruins to respectability.   But with a new Offensive Coordinator and the return of a HEALTHY Josh Rosen at Quarterback, the Bruins could easily hit new highs like the Dow Jones and Nasdaq.

The blame for last year’s fiasco falls squarely on the injury to Rosen, and the horrendous playcalling and nonexistent adjustments made by the incompetent Offensive Coordinator Kennedy Polamalu, who was immediately fired in disgrace after the season.  So with the respected Jedd Fisch coming in as the new O.C., and with Rosen looking as strong as ever, 4-8 should quickly become a distant memory.

Saturday was UCLA Football’s Fan Appreciation Day on campus, with the program’s supporters encouraged to attend practice.  It was nice, but Continue Reading »

DON’T HAVE A COWLINGS, MAN!

Ay CAR-amaba!  And that car is a White Ford Bronco — Thanks to a $15 Million “anonymous” donation, u$c has named a residential building on campus after the trojan who was charged with a felony for aiding fugitive O.J. Simpson after the infamous double murders

[I know this is an older story, which was first reported last month, but I was just informed of it (by a reader who really GETS IT), so here is my take:]

U$C never ceases to amaze, with their severe lack of class and integrity.  It is all about Football, Winning, and of course, the Mighty Dollar.  They allow a KNOWN Meth Addict to party on campus with hookers and criminals, and they extend his multi-million dollar contract to continue on as DEAN of their Medical School, because they don’t want to lose his FUNDRAISING acumen.  They refuse to take down a double-murderer’s giant ceremonial football jersey or their copy of his Heisman Trophy because TOUCHDOWNS, and now, just to show that these are not aberrations, they have named a brand new campus residential building after Al “A.C.” Cowlings, because $$$$.

Cowlings, you will remember, was the driver of the infamous White Ford Bronco that Continue Reading »

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