Dedicated to the HATRED of all things trOJan


Ay CAR-amaba!  And that car is a White Ford Bronco — Thanks to a $15 Million “anonymous” donation, u$c has named a residential building on campus after the trojan who was charged with a felony for aiding fugitive O.J. Simpson after the infamous double murders

[I know this is an older story, which was first reported last month, but I was just informed of it (by a reader who really GETS IT), so here is my take:]

U$C never ceases to amaze, with their severe lack of class and integrity.  It is all about Football, Winning, and of course, the Mighty Dollar.  They allow a KNOWN Meth Addict to party on campus with hookers and criminals, and they extend his multi-million dollar contract to continue on as DEAN of their Medical School, because they don’t want to lose his FUNDRAISING acumen.  They refuse to take down a double-murderer’s giant ceremonial football jersey or their copy of his Heisman Trophy because TOUCHDOWNS, and now, just to show that these are not aberrations, they have named a brand new campus residential building after Al “A.C.” Cowlings, because $$$$.

Cowlings, you will remember, was the driver of the infamous White Ford Bronco that helped O.J. Simpson evade Police just days after O.J. killed Nicole Brown and Ronald Goldman.  That act was a FELONY, and Cowlings was — deservedly — charged with that crime.

Cowlings, who was Simpson’s Football teammate in high school, at SC, and in the Pro’s as well, claims that Simpson put a gun to his own head and threatened to kill himself if Al didn’t drive him on that fateful day.  Many analysts say that is nonsense, and Al knew that O.J. would never commit suicide — he just wanted to help his friend avoid punishment for the heinous murders.  Asked 20 years later, Cowlings refuses to maintain that O.J. is innocent of the killings.  Kato Kaelin — the other guy who would know — says he thinks O.J. did it, so Cowlings is not alone.

Cowlings cemented himself into Americana when he was on the phone in the Bronco, telling Police: “My name is A.C.!  You know who I am, goddamit!”  So it’s no wonder that he would be preferred to be remembered for something else.  That’s probably why he enlisted a super-wealthy buddy to plunk down $15 million anonymously to get the Cowlings Residential College named in A.C.’s “honor.”

Trojan SCumbag Wayne Hughes, owner of Public Storage, is a long-time friend of Cowlings, so he is rumored to be the anonymous donor.  Apparently, $15 mil is the price of integrity in South Central L.A.  Did u$c, a school that yearns to be considered “prestigious,” really need the money that badly, that they would name a building after such a lowlife?  The whole construction project, of which this building is only a small part, cost $700 Million.  $15 mil is just a drop in the bucket.  Is it really worth it to SELL OUT like that?  The Clown College continues to be a laughingstock, with money-grab moves like this at the expense of RESPECT.

Mr. Cowlings’ Wild Ride might have been his low point, but it wasn’t the only low-light of his life.  After the trial, the greedily opportunistic weasel charged people $2.99 a minute to call him up and ask him questions about anything BUT the case.  Who the hell would call him to ask him about OTHER stuff, you ask?  Enough to NET him over a million dollars, that’s who!

But sadly for A.C., a million dollars wasn’t enough to support his trojan lifestyle.  Because after all that, he was found selling handbags and facing bankruptcy.  Maybe next time you call an Uber, he will pick you up in a White Ford Bronco.  Have him take you to Cowlings Residential College, where you can probably dine in the Furhman Cafeteria.  Be sure to order “The Juice.”

"DON’T HAVE A COWLINGS, MAN!" was published on August 1st, 2017 and is listed in News from the Dark Side.

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