Category: Blue & Gold News
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JACKASS-FREE D
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Now it’s for Reel: Tonight is the Due Date of the Hereafter for Ben “Megamind” Howland’s Unstoppable, re-stocked Bruins to reach for the Skyline, and for fans who Saw Red for 127 Hours last year to feel some Morning Glory with Conviction, right from this season’s Inception The Exhibition Season…
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WHAM, BAM, THANK YOU LAMB
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Ch-ch-ch-Changes: It could be a Golden Year for Young American Tyler Lamb, who scores 17 in a win over the Golden Eagles, and who could be one of the Heroes to reach early Fame if the Bruins are saying “Let’s Dance” in March Lean on me, man, if you can’t…
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KATZ IN THE CRADLE
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Young Bruins youth-a-nize Katz, pop ‘quizz, and give Beavers a (For)bath as time expires, in Harry 17-14 upset That’s Harry, as in Chapin. And little boys Blue feel like Men on the Moon, and you know they’ll have a good time now. Ryan Katz’ Homecoming was not as pleasant as he expected. …
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PACE CADETS
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Howland’s recruits blast off to a running start, using a speed-of-light transition game to rocket to a 95-59 win, despite going 3-for-21 from outer space Apollo, Ohno! The UCLA Bruins launched their Exhibition Season on Thursday night, starting the final countdown to the regular season, and for a nice change of pace from…
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TACKLE-ME ELMO
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Bruins aren’t tacklish at all in un-funny 29-21 loss to Wildcats, then big Birds toy with trojans before saying “Open Sesame” to floodgates, and teaching a lesson to (non-) tackling dummies in 53-32 laugher Usc is 2-3 in the Pac-10. That WOULD have been good for a chuckle, if the…
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PLOTZIN’ IN AUTZEN
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Verklempt, blue-ish Bruins lay an egg against the #1 Ducks, who easily live up to their billing with a 60-13 slaughter Some of my best friends are blue-ish. UCLA finally played the way they were expected to — Horribly. The Bruins got absolutely destroyed by Oregon in noisy Autzen Stadium,…
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LUCK YOU (AND THE HORSE YOU RODE IN ON)
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The trojans are Lucked Up Beyond All Recognition, after Stanford’s Andrew Luck saddles them with their second straight last-second photo-finish loss Yeah, I know: UCLA sucks much worse than usc does, and usc is going to kill the Bruins in December. UCLA got absolutely destroyed by Cal on Saturday, 35-7…
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RUSHING (UN)DRESSING
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UCLA tossed the Cougars’ salad with 437 yards on the ground, but fans wonder: Will it lettuce bowl over the upcoming diet of heartier foes, or are we about to crash into a low-Cal iceberg? It’s time to find out if cool-as-a-cucumber Norm Chow is truly earning his healthy celery You can’t rush…
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BRUINS GET STOKED WHILE BEHIND, TROJANS GET FOLKED FROM BEHIND (AGAIN)
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With Honorary Captain and trojan-killer J.J. Stokes on hand, UCLA snaps out of a lull to come back and beat WSU, and afterwards watch usc lose to UW on a last-second, Erik Folk Field Goal (for the second year in a row) Not…
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AFTER DUMPING TEXAS, PRINCE GETS STUCK WITH ALAMO-KNEE
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Despite hearing his knee pop in Texas, Kevin Prince stayed in and led the Bruins to bliss, but he hasn’t practiced since — Do you hope Neuheisel is still married to the idea of starting a rusty QB? I do It’s time to pop the question: QB, or not QB —…
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BORN-AGAIN BURN ‘HORNS AGAIN
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“To err is human; To Ayers is Divine” Pistol Cathedral: Re-born Bruins play like they’re on a Mission, forcing revenge-minded Texas to be generous, Rushing all over them, and ultimately nailing them, 34-12 Call it a “Miracle on 34th Street.” 34 Points, against the Nation’s #1 Rushing Defense, almost entirely…
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“THIS WAS NOT A VOTING ACCIDENT!” [WE’RE GONNA NEED A BIGGER VOTE]
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Joe Bruin needs your vote in the Capital One Mascot Challenge, to avoid the Jaws of defeat, and to harpoon 15,000 clams for the UCLA Spirit Squad Have you ever wanted to support a good cause, but didn’t have any extra money? Well, here’s an opportunity for you to help your…