Month: September 2010

  • AFTER DUMPING TEXAS, PRINCE GETS STUCK WITH ALAMO-KNEE

    Despite hearing his knee pop in Texas, Kevin Prince stayed in and led the Bruins to bliss, but he hasn’t practiced since — Do you hope Neuheisel is still married to the idea of starting a rusty QB?  I do It’s time to pop the question:  QB, or not QB —…

  • BORN-AGAIN BURN ‘HORNS AGAIN

    “To err is human; To Ayers is Divine” Pistol Cathedral:  Re-born Bruins play like they’re on a Mission, forcing revenge-minded Texas to be generous, Rushing all over them, and ultimately nailing them, 34-12 Call it a “Miracle on 34th Street.”  34 Points,  against the Nation’s #1 Rushing Defense, almost entirely…

  • “THIS WAS NOT A VOTING ACCIDENT!” [WE’RE GONNA NEED A BIGGER VOTE]

      Joe Bruin needs your vote in the Capital One Mascot Challenge, to avoid the Jaws of defeat, and to harpoon 15,000 clams for the UCLA Spirit Squad Have you ever wanted to support a good cause, but didn’t have any extra money?  Well, here’s an opportunity for you to help your…

  • I GET NO KICK FROM SHAM’S PAIN (EVEN WHEN THE FIBBER BREAKS A FIBULA)

    Karma & Reg:  Reggie Bush’s muff leads to a broken leg and six weeks of rehab, in what many are calling an act of Karma — but six weeks of muffs would have been better I don’t like to see Reggie Bush get hurt.  I don’t like to see anyone…

  • EASY A+

    Head of the Class:  It’s okay to wear an “A” on your chest, as long as it’s preceded by “UCL” (and not in scarlet) What is it with Football Reporters (especially on the Internet) and GRADES?  Everyone wants to be the Teacher, finally turning the tables, and doling out letter grades to…

  • FRANKLIN’S ELECTRICITY SHOCKS UCLA BACK TO LIFE

    Franklin Mint gets bad taste out of Bruin mouths, with 158 yards Rushing and 3 TD’s to Key 31-13 upset of #23 Houston Sorry for the delay, but there was so much celebrating — of Touchdowns, of Interceptions, and of not sucking any more — that it took forever to…

  • TROJAN-ON-TROJAN HATE

    Steve Sarkissian says Reggie Bush looks like an idiot again, for not fessing up Maybe Pat Haden thinks Reggie Bush’s return of the Heisman Trophy was “noble,” but ex-trojan Coach Steve Sarkissian thinks that it was a completely empty gesture.  According to Sark, Bush’s forfeit-without-admitting-guilt was a completely idiotic waste…

  • WORTH THE PRICE OF ADMISSION

    Bush says returning the Heisman was NOT an admission of guilt — Of course not:  A real trOJan never confesses Reggie Bush and O.J. Simpson:  The trojan “If I Did It” Twins.  Two usc Heisman-trophy winning* u$c Tailbacks, who are the only two people in the World who think that either…

  • YOU WANT COUGARS OR CO-EDS?

    With the high-scoring Houston Cougars coming to town, the intercourse should be about Football, but thanks to UCLA’s limp performance so far, the only excitement around here is for the Spirit Squad Norm Chow’s Offense needs a shot of Viagra.  And if they sustain a drive for more than 4…

  • RETURNING TRICKS

    Ho, ho, ho:  6-year Pro RB/Returner Reggie Bush voluntarily returns his Heisman, but muffs it, by waiting until the trophy was moments away from being repo-ed, and by not taking responsibility for his (illegal) actions First he was forced to give up his trophy wife, and now he has been forced to…

  • UCLA McDLT: THE COLD STAY COLD, THE HOT STAY HOT

    The Grimacing Bruin Football team may be frigid as a McBlizzard, but the Spirit Squad is hotter than the Hamburglar’s new iPod You deserve a break today.  So here is a second helping of brand new UCLA Cheerleader photos, to take your mind off of what happened in the Rose…