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TROJAN ANCHOR SINKS CAROLINA IN SUPER BOWL SHIPWRECK

Ka-lil, Ker-plunk:  Friendly fire torpedoes Panthers, as their own Offensive Line — anchored by ex-trojan Center Ryan Kalil — is like a screen door on a submarine, allowing Denver’s Defense to get 7 Sacks, cause 4 Turnovers, and score a Touchdown in the Broncos’ 24-10 Super Bowl 50 Victory

Peyton Manning, despite an entirely lackluster performance, is a World Champion once again, hopefully in his last game ever.  His two Turnovers and historically bad streak of 3rd Down failures allowed Carolina to hang around, but in the end, it was the incompetence of the Panther Offense to get anything going that allowed Manning to go out on top with a 24-10 triumph.

Carolina — a 6-point favorite to win the game — underperformed on the Offensive side of the ball all game long.  Cam Newton was simply horrible in his first Super Bowl, making decisions worse than the one his Dad allegedly made asking colleges to pay $300,000 for his son to attend.  But the reason Newton was so ineffective was that his swiss cheese O-Line was so useless.  They committed a half-dozen pre-snap penalties, and allowed the Denver defenders free reign to harass Newton into repeated mistakes.  One Interception stopped a drive in the red zone, and two of the seven Sacks led to lost fumbles, including one recovered in the end zone for a TD.

The Panther Offensive Continue Reading »

IT TAKES A LOTTA BALLS TO DO IT RIGHT

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Super Ball Saturday — Footballs, Basketballs, Meatballs, Crab Balls, and Cheese Balls help make the UCLA Spirit Squad’s lavish fundraising ball a huge success, just like Bruin Football Recruiting, which I learned tonight also does it right: Achieving success while operating with total INTEGRITY unheard of in this day and age

Despite the depressing results of the last three Rivalry games, I am still proud to be a Bruin.  Why am I such a die-hard, for so long, through thick and thin?  Two answers became glaringly apparent on Saturday night, at the UCLA Spirit Squad Fundraising Reception.  Let’s start with the class, beauty, grace, and SWEETNESS of the UCLA Spirit Squad.  I love these people SO much, including the Coaches, and former squad members.  They are so nice, friendly, down-to-earth, humble, personable, and warm.

And yes, I know it is a fundraiser, so they “HAVE” to be nice.  Sure, they are trying to get people to donate money.  I get it.  But I also know the difference between phony and sincere.  And these people also are aware that I am not a Donald Trump 1-percenter.  I am not going to be endowing any scholarships any time soon.  But it doesn’t matter.  These people are being nice because they ARE nice, deep down.  I feel more like FAMILY in this environment than I do at my own family reunions.  Special heart-warmed emotional appreciation goes out to Kyle & Kayley (and their family), Irazmi, Nicole, Ann, Kate, Jane, Juliet, Julia, Kelly, McKenna, Christina, Lauren, SOPHIE (who I didn’t know knew who I was, and who looked the best I have ever seen her last night), and of course, Mollie (and the Selection Committee) for assembling this wonderful group.  If I didn’t list a name, it was NOT because they weren’t nice or anything like that, it’s just that I didn’t get a chance to socialize with them.  Also three girls were Continue Reading »

THE TROJAN WART

Choker’s Wild — Ex-trojan Carson Palmer blunders through the NFC Championship game, personally committing SIX Turnovers:  TWO lost fumbles, and FOUR Interceptions, including TWO in the End Zone, and a Pick-6, dragging Arizona to a season-terminating 49-15 loss

The Carolina Panthers are going to the Super Bowl.  Most people will say that their MVP in the NFC Title game was their Quarterback Cam Newton.  But it could be argued that their REAL MVP was the OTHER QB.  Cardinals’ Quarterback Carson Palmer was simply atrocious, turning the ball over a remarkable SIX times in the 49-15 loss.

Palmer’s supporters will blame his injured finger.  But his finger does not explain Palmer’s two lost fumbles in the first half, that helped Carolina build a 24-7 halftime lead.  And if the finger was the cause of the 4 Interceptions, then he should have SAT OUT the game and let his back-up take a crack at it.  Instead, Carson gave the finger to all the Cardinals fans, by personally destroying their chance to make it into Super Bowl 50.

The Cardinals have one other trojan on their roster:  Frostee Rucker, who is infamous for being accused of raping a 12-year old, and repeatedly beating up a usc coed, didn’t help the Cardinals’ cause either.  He wasn’t as damaging as Palmer was, but Continue Reading »

SEE USC’S DIXON. SEE DIXON GET BUSTED FOR CARJACKING. DON’T BE A DIXON

Driving it into the end zone — Ex-trojan Tight End Bryce Dixon, who had previously gotten in trouble for sexual misconduct, is now in jail for suspicion of carjacking and/or a series of robberies

All’s well that ends well?  Bryce Dixon was a hotshot trojan Tight End, when he got embroiled in a campus sex SCandal.  Two of them, actually, with the same girl.  He got kicked off the team, and thrown out of school.  Then he sued the school, and got back in.  Now he’s in jail, where he may be more at home, considering that sexual misconduct is often the norm in prison.

This time, unwanted sexual advances are not the issue.  This time, it’s the unwanted commandeering of someone else’s vehicle.  Apparently, this guy likes to touch things with headlights, that don’t belong to him.  Is this the trojan culture of entitlement at work?  Why do so many trojans get busted for assuming they can do anything they want?  I wonder.

Dixon was picked up during an investigation of a series of robberies, and is now being held for suspicion of carjacking.  Bail is set at $100,000.  Let’s see if the trojan machine that usually saves their athletes from their inevitable legal trouble Continue Reading »

DeMar DeRozan DeFrocks da trojans’ academics

3+1 = 3 — Ex-trojan’s “duh” moment and admission that he didn’t attend college discloses u$c’s despicable academic deception

Some people think that after 50 years, u$c is finally starting to close the academic gap by which it has always trailed UCLA.  They claim that by using their vast financial resources, they have been hiring (and poaching) better professors, and acquiring newer technology to help salvage their pathetic academic reputation.  This may all be true.  After all, with all their money, they SHOULD be able to provide everything needed for a high-quality education.  But don’t let this fool you — When it comes to athletics, they still have no integrity, and will admit ANYONE, and let them matriculate without putting in any effort scholastically speaking.  Case in point:  DeMar DeRozan.

The former u$c Basketball star’s lack of schooling was exposed to the Nation this week, as he was interviewed about a road trip.  When asked about his trip, he used fuzzy math indicative of his education.  After losing two games and having one left to play, he said he was hoping to end the trip 1-and-3.  So apparently, he thinks 1+3=3.  After getting called out by a teammate, he argued his case.  So even after being shown his mistake, he stood firmly by it, refusing to admit or even understand that he screwed up.  After a moment of deep reflection, he FINALLY started to figure it out, and his teammate had to explain that DeMar MEANT to say 1-FOR-3, not 1-AND-3.  Hooray!  Then his teammate made fun of DeRozan and the school DeRozan attended, saying sarcastically “USC, Baby!”  The way he said it implied that DeMar’s going to SC was the logical explanation for why he was so stupid.

But DeRozan’s momentary lapse of brain activity is NOT the highlight of the interview, and neither was his teammate’s blatant insult of U$C.  In an effort to explain away his faux pas, DeMar announced that he didn’t attend college his year at SC anyway.

Oops.  The jig is up.  A blatant admission to the press by a trojan athlete that he didn’t attend classes while still enrolled at, and playing for, U$C.  Not since trojan Footballer Marc Tyler admitted to getting paid to play for them has U$C been so burnt by one of their athletes… unless you count the Football player who is suing them for making him play through a concussion, blaming them for his brain damage.  Moral of the story:  The mind is a terrible thing to waste — or get wasted — by going to u$c.

In other news, ex-trojan Coach Pete Carroll Continue Reading »

PUSSY GALORE-Y

Holy Honor Blackman! — It’s a glorious night in Westwood, as UCLA celebrates Russell Westbrook’s donation, and, for the second time this season, de-claws some highly-rated Wildcats; This time, Bryce Alford’s step-back 3-pointer with 1.8 seconds left beats Arizona, 87-84

NBA Superstar (and former Bruin stud) Russell Westbrook recently made a huge donation to UCLA, which will help build a new Basketball practice facility next to Pauley Pavilion, with the court inside the new facility to be named after Westbrook.  To commemorate this generosity, last night was Russell Westbrook Night at Pauley, and with Russell and his OKC Thunder Teammates in attendance, the Bruins gave everyone even more to celebrate.

With an upset victory over the then-#1 Kentucky Wildcats already under their belts at Pauley, the Bruins did it again, this time shocking the #7 Arizona Wildcats, 87-84.  UCLA led throughout the game, behind surprisingly tight Defense, equally-surprising passing expertise, and even more surprising sharpshooting from the perimeter.  The Bruins parlayed these factors into a 14-point lead with about 6 minutes to go in the game.  But then Arizona went to work, finally hitting some shots and driving to the hoop, to tie the game in the final seconds.

That’s when Bryce Alford got the ball, used a Tony Parker screen to get a mismatch against a tall, slow defender, and stepped back to get enough space to drain a three-pointer with 1.8 seconds left.  While Alford mugged for the cameras, Arizona came down the court to attempt the potential game-tying shot, but the shooter was stripped, and the game was over.

Alford led all scorers with 25, Parker got a double-double, Continue Reading »

TWO CHOKE GIRLS

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Choking a gift horse in the mouth — Trojan “stars” Kessler and Smith-Schuster both totally choke in the final 30 seconds of the Holiday Bowl, allowing Wisconsin to salvage a 23-21 victory, DESPITE a Badgers’ game-winning Touchdown being disallowed on a blatantly BLOWN CALL

For a while, it looked like it was going to happen again:  The trojans would get an undeserved win due to an obviously WRONG call by the referees.  With the trojans up on Wisconsin with 9 minutes to go in the 4th quarter 21-20, a Badger runner breaks free down the sidelines for a  73-yard Touchdown run.  But as he rambled for the score, a blind (or crooked) Ref blew his whistle, ending the play, on the faulty belief that the ballcarrier stepped out of bounds.  Because the whistle sounded, the play was not reviewable.  Of course, the Nation saw what the TV announcers confirmed:  It wasn’t even close.  The video evidence was irrefutable and indisputable — the Badger’s shoe did not touch the out-of-bounds line.

After this egregiously-blown call, the drive stalled and Wisky had to punt.  All the trojans had to do was Continue Reading »

THE CORNING AFTER

CaliCORNication —  The Cornhuskers pound the Bruins for 326 yards on the ground, scoring 30 straight points to win the Foster Farms Bowl 37-29

Did UCLA think they were playing Stanford again?  They were in Northern California, and the opponents — and the majority of fans — were wearing Red and White, and those red and white-clad players rammed the ball down the Bruins’ throats all night long  via the ground game, exactly the way Stanford has beaten the Bruins 8 times in a row.

The Bruins built an early 21-7 lead, via sharp play by QB Josh Rosen, but then UCLA went soft, allowing the Cornhuskers to control the trenches, the clock, and the game.  Nebraska scored 30 straight points, by mostly running the ball right at the Bruins, and by forcing Rosen to leave his comfort zone.  Nebraska took a 37-21 lead, pressuring Rosen into multiple off-target throws Continue Reading »

CLUTCH KICKER KA’IMI & KICKASS KENNY CLARK COLLECT KUDOS

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Congrats, kids! — Ka’imi Fairbairn wins the Lou Groza Award as the Nation’s Best Kicker, and is named 1st Team All-American, and Kenny Clark makes 3rd Team All-American

It’s hard to write about UCLA Football after what happened last month, but I would be remiss if I failed to mention the prestigious honors recently bestowed on two Bruins — Ka’imi Fairbairn and Kenny Clark.  Ka’imi, UCLA’s Placekicker who this season broke fellow Bruin John Lee’s All-Time Scoring Record for the Pac-12 Conference, was recognized as the #1 Kicker in the Country, when he received the Lou Groza Award and was named to the All-American 1st Team.  Ka’imi didn’t miss a single Field Goal from 40 yards or less, and made a 60-yarder against Cal this year, and those two qualifications were easily enough to earn the title of Nation’s Best Kicker.  Ka’imi has sure come a long way from his first season as a Bruin, when he missed/had blocked 3 of his first 5 PAT’s.  In fact, Bruin fans in the Rose Bowl had such little confidence in him, that they started to shush the whole crowd every time he lined up to kick an extra point.  Talk about Rags-to-Riches!  His worst-to-best transition now has him eyeballing an NFL career, where he will join his UCLA predecessor Kai Forbath, who kicks for New Orleans now.

Also on a path to the NFL is Bruin Defensive Lineman Kenny Clark, who is now also an All-American.  Clark was named to the 3rd Team, despite losing his line-mate Eddie Vanderdoes at the start of the season.  Without E.V. next to him, Clark was subjected to double-teams all year.  But even getting blocked by two guys at a time failed to stop Clark from dominating games, and gaining this National recognition.

Speaking of National recognition, the UCLA Basketball team has overcome a weak start, and is now inching back onto the map.  After whipping #1 Kentucky, and going to Gonzaga and beating the #20 Bulldogs in hostile enemy territory, then coming home to extend their winning streak to 5 games, Continue Reading »

KENTUCKY FRIED BRICKIN’

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REALLY Wild Cats can’t hit the bucket — UCLA burns #1 Kentucky to a crisp 87-77, as Alford thoroughly out-cooks Calipari, with his not-so-secret recipe of packing in the Defense, forcing UK to force outside shots, of which they hit 6 of 29 until after the game was decided… and the rest was gravy

What just happened?  Did you see what I saw?  The lowly, unranked 4-3 Bruins of UCLA just DOMINATED the 7-0 Kentucky Wildcats — formerly the #1 team in the Nation — 87-77, to shock the Country on National TV.  The ESPN viewers from coast-to-coast were stunned as UCLA manhandled the team that destroyed the Bruins a year ago, leading 41-7 at halftime last season.

A similar outcome was expected by many Bruin fans this year, after watching losses to Monmouth, Wake Forest, and Kansas.  Apparently, the betting public wasn’t convinced, making the Wildcats only SIX-POINT Favorites in the game.  It sure seemed like a ridiculously low number, considering that Kentucky had beaten all 7 of their opponents this season by double-digits, including an 11-point win over mighty Duke.

And on this night, Kentucky took a 2-0 lead, BUT NEVER LED AGAIN!.  The Bruins stormed ahead by Continue Reading »

ROSEN IMPLOSION

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UCLA’s True Freshman Quarterback finally plays like a True Freshman, committing three straight critical Turnovers, one returned for a game-changing TD, as UCLA blows a second-half 21-20 lead to lose 40-21, ending the Bruins’ three-game winning streak against the trojans

Josh Rosen is a great Quarterback.  Even as a True Freshman, he set the UCLA All-Time Record for most consecutive passes without an Interception, and all season long, he showed talent and smarts that portends of a Heisman run in the near future.  Rosen has been so good all year long, that he has even been compared to legendary Bruin QB Troy Aikman.  Airman, a 3-time Super Bowl Champion with the Dallas Cowboys, had a knack for throwing the ball where only his Receivers could reach them, and up until Saturday, you could say the same thing about Rosen.  And Rosen now has one other parallel with Aikman:  He played his worst game ever against u$c.

You can’t really lay it on first-time Rivalry Game jitters, since Rosen wasn’t bad in the first two and a half quarters, as he led UCLA to a 21-20 lead.  As that score indicated, the teams were pretty even for 37 minutes of play, even with sc getting a Touchdown on a Punt Return before Halftime.  Rosen threw a 19-yard TD pass to Thomas Duarte in the 2nd quarter, and Paul Perkins’ second TD of the game gave the Bruins their 21-20 lead in the 3rd quarter.  The Bruins actually had the ball, leading by 1 halfway through the 3rd, when everything went to Hell.

It all started when Continue Reading »

FIRE’S UP, FOUR’S UP!

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Feel the burn — This year, because there are no protestors and no wind, we finally get a flaming fire… and a funny Forte… and a frightening faux pas, as the fans feverishly file for fourth straight defeat of Fig Tech

Jim Mora knows how to fire up a crowd, and he knows how to fire up his team, especially for the annual Big Game.  In his three years as Head Coach of UCLA, the three best performances the Bruins have had, arguably, have come in the three games against u$c.  Three straight trojan-killings, leaving no doubt that Mora respects the Rivalry, and gets that through to his players.

Of course, he had ultimate trojan–killa Brett Hundley at his disposal for all three of those annihilations.  This year, he will need to get the job done with True Freshman Josh Rosen at the helm.  Hundley was a dual-threat QB, who could beat you with his legs.  This is just the kind of quarterback who always gives sc trouble.  So can pocket-passer Rosen continue the success?  Will he run the ball a few times to keep sc guessing, maybe on the read option, to stop sc from keying on Paul Perkins?

Mora and O.C. Noel Mazzone have had sc’s number these last three years, so we will have to see if they can do it without Hundley there to WILL HIMSELF to those scrambling, third-down conversions.  One good omen is that in these games, TURNOVERS usually tip the scale, and Rosen hasn’t thrown an Interception in a couple of months!  He must continue to play keep-away, especially from Adoree Jackson and Sua Cravens, or it will not be a good day for the boys in blue.

If Mora beats sc for the fourth straight time — this time as an underdog, on the road — he will achieve god-like status, at least to people like me, who take the Rivalry super-seriously…  Which makes something Mora said at the bonfire dramatically troubling.  There have been some rumors about u$c trying to poach Mora to the dark side, which is fairly absurd, but the idea that he may go back to the PRO’S is more of a credible threat.  And on Tuesday night, Mora TRIED to say that a victory in the game on Saturday could deliver a Pac-12 South Division Championship to the Bruins.  But what came out was “NFL Championship.”

Could Mora have the NFL on his mind, because he is going to bail on UCLA after this season?  He said it was just a little faux pas, but Freudian slips like this are Continue Reading »

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